“Love is supposed to be tragic and painful” is false (blog post)

Love can hurt but hurting shouldn’t be at its core, it shouldn’t be the currency of love.

If your relationship(s) romantic or not only bring turmoil and pain, that isn’t healthy, that isn’t sustainable, no matter how many “grace periods” there are in between.

Brief hurt and grief and conflict is normal but a sustained pattern of suffering isn’t.

Love isn’t built from fear and anger and shame.

Every day I value safety, stability, communication, and compassion more and more over soap opera-esque drama and turmoil.