remember

In my dreams, I remember how it was,
tendrils of slow, subtle memories –
delicate and fine, wavering in the wind,
untouched by sharp edges of reality,
(I remember.)
Nights wide awake, guarding moonlight and the stars above,
swallowed by the indigo sky,
unsure of what it was that was spinning in my mind,
a mosaic of scattered colours brand new,
back then, it was true.
Careless, carefree, we were lost and wasting time,
I have not yet after those days passed, felt so alive.
(a surreality so sublime;
…lost? waiting to be found.
somewhere back in that time.)
Now I…am
trying to speak, trying to write –
Alright.

It’s simple.
(It was.)

Every cell on fire.
blood and bone and breath –
a choir,
an orchestra of noise,,,,,, – what noise? a CACOPHONY between the heart lines:::::
!strings snapping, wood cracking, a deep thundering heartbeat rising/////// / / / /      /
inside, inside, inside never pausing a crescendo of life to never die not even in the quiet of the night not yielding to the cries the time the life the –

I tell you: that’s how it felt like.
We were never, ever, going to die.

I, I

I

I. remember how it was.
A scattered daydream now, a nightmare
It was never true, maybe it was never there,
tendrils of slow, subtle memories –
delicate and fine, wavering in the wind,
washed away by the tides of reality and time.